Cynthia Erivo Opens Up About Personal Struggles and Pronoun Controversy: “Bigots Refuse to See Me as I Am”

Acclaimed actress and singer Cynthia Erivo has never been one to shy away from truth. With a Grammy, an Emmy, and a Tony Award to her name, along with an Academy Award nomination for her unforgettable role as Harriet Tubman, Erivo has already cemented her place in Hollywood royalty.

Yet despite her incredible accomplishments and an estimated net worth of over $5 million, the British-Nigerian star is speaking out about what she says remains the most difficult part of her life: the ongoing refusal by some people to respect her identity and her chosen pronouns — “them.”

In a heartfelt and unfiltered interview, Erivo opened up about her journey with gender identity, revealing the emotional toll of being misgendered, disrespected, and, in her words, “rejected by bigots who refuse to acknowledge who I am.”

Her statement has reignited public debate over gender pronouns and the treatment of nonbinary individuals in the spotlight.

Cynthia Erivo’s Pronoun Journey: A Public Declaration of Identity

Cynthia Erivo, who rose to global fame through her powerful performances on Broadway and in major motion pictures, made headlines in 2024 when she publicly announced that she uses the pronouns “them/themself.”

The revelation came during an LGBTQ+ summit in Los Angeles, where the actress shared that embracing her nonbinary identity had been a “long and liberating process.”

“I’ve always known there was more to me than a label,” she said at the time. “For a long time, I tried to fit into a binary box, because that’s what society expected. But now, I know I don’t have to.”

The statement was met with a mix of admiration and criticism. While many fans and LGBTQ+ advocacy groups applauded Erivo’s courage, others pushed back with harsh criticism and, in some cases, outright mockery.

“Bigots Won’t Even Try”: Erivo Speaks Out

In a recent interview with The Guardian, Erivo became emotional as she described the persistent resistance she faces from both fans and colleagues in the entertainment industry.

“It’s heartbreaking, really,” Erivo said.

“Some people who claim to support me still refuse to use my pronouns. They’ll say ‘she,’ ‘her,’ or even avoid referring to me at all — like acknowledging who I am is too much for them.”

Erivo went on to explain that the issue goes deeper than just language.

“It’s about respect,” they said. “When someone looks you in the eye and refuses to use the words you’ve asked them to — that’s not just ignorance. That’s a choice. That’s bigotry.”

Erivo’s Identity and Advocacy in the LGBTQ+ Community

Erivo’s openness about their gender identity has made them a prominent figure in conversations around LGBTQ+ representation in media.

They’ve taken part in several major campaigns, including a collaboration with GLAAD to promote awareness of nonbinary identities and pronoun education.

GLAAD President Sarah Kate Ellis issued a statement in support of Erivo, saying: “Cynthia Erivo is a trailblazer.

Their courage to live openly and authentically is a beacon of hope for nonbinary individuals around the world.

We must do better in creating a world where everyone’s identity is respected.”

Erivo’s story has also been featured in Out, Variety, and The Hollywood Reporter, with many publications praising the actress for being one of the few Black nonbinary celebrities to speak so boldly about their experience.

Online Backlash and Social Media Harassment

However, the praise hasn’t shielded Erivo from online abuse. Following their announcement, Erivo’s social media accounts were inundated with hate comments, ranging from deliberate misgendering to outright transphobic slurs. One user wrote, “You’ll always be a woman to me,” while another claimed, “This pronoun stuff is ridiculous.”

Erivo responded by posting a simple message on Instagram: “I am not your ‘she.’ I am them. That’s it.”

Despite blocking and reporting many of the harassers, Erivo admitted that the emotional toll is still heavy.

“You get used to the hate, but you shouldn’t have to,” they said. “No one should.”

Erivo’s Career: From Tony Awards to Tough Truths

Cynthia Erivo first dazzled Broadway in 2015 as Celie in the revival of The Color Purple, earning her a Tony Award for Best Actress in a Musical.

Her role as Harriet Tubman in the 2019 film Harriet earned her an Academy Award nomination and widespread acclaim for bringing one of history’s most iconic freedom fighters to life.

Despite their soaring success, Erivo said that their identity often becomes a “target” for conservative audiences.

“I can play Harriet Tubman, I can sing at the Oscars, and I can make a statement at the Met Gala.

But for some people, the minute I say ‘my pronouns are them,’ I become controversial,” they noted. “That tells you something about the world we live in.”

Pronouns and the Battle for Visibility in Hollywood

The entertainment industry has seen a growing wave of gender-diverse individuals coming forward with their stories. Stars like Sam Smith, Emma Corrin, and Demi Lovato have all publicly embraced nonbinary identities and faced similar resistance.

In 2023, a Pew Research Center study revealed that 42% of Americans still don’t understand what nonbinary pronouns mean, and 36% say they’re uncomfortable using “they/them” for individuals.

This discomfort has manifested in media, politics, and even in Hollywood — where acceptance is often perceived as more advanced.

“People think that because I’m famous, it’s easier for me,” Erivo said. “But bigotry doesn’t care about your net worth or your résumé. It finds you anyway.”

Mental Health and the Cost of Misunderstanding

For Erivo, the consequences of being repeatedly misgendered go beyond annoyance — they affect mental health.

In a heartfelt moment during the interview, they shared how misgendering feels like being “cut open” over and over again.

“It’s like constantly being told you don’t exist,” they said. “It chips away at your sense of self.”

Mental health experts have backed up this sentiment, pointing out that misgendering can lead to anxiety, depression, and social withdrawal.

Dr. Amani Greene, a gender studies professor and psychologist, explained that repeated invalidation can have “profound and lasting effects.”

“When someone’s identity is consistently denied, it sends a message that they’re not worthy of being seen,” Dr. Greene said.

“This can result in chronic stress and mental health struggles — especially for people of color and those in the LGBTQ+ community.”

Erivo’s Message to Their Fans and Critics

Despite the pain and pushback, Cynthia Erivo remains resilient. In her most recent public message to fans, she emphasized the importance of visibility and solidarity.

“I’m not asking for applause,” they wrote in a post on X (formerly Twitter). “I’m asking for humanity.”

They also encouraged fans who support them to speak up against hate when they see it.

“Don’t let bigotry go unchecked — even in casual conversation,” Erivo said. “Every time you correct someone, you make space for someone like me.”

Financial Success Doesn’t Shield From Discrimination

With a growing list of film and TV credits, including upcoming projects with Disney and Netflix, Erivo is one of the most sought-after talents in entertainment.

Her estimated net worth exceeds $5 million, and she has brand partnerships with high-profile fashion and lifestyle companies.

Yet, Erivo insists that money and fame don’t protect against identity-based discrimination.

“It doesn’t matter how much I make. It doesn’t matter how many awards I have. Some people will never see me as valid — and that’s heartbreaking,” they said.

Erivo also expressed frustration with the assumption that success should make her immune to struggle.

“There’s this idea that if you’re rich or famous, you can’t be oppressed. That’s not true,” they said.

“Oppression doesn’t check your bank account before it hits you.”

What Comes Next for Cynthia Erivo?

As Erivo prepares for a series of new roles — including one in a high-profile science fiction series where they’ll play a gender-fluid alien leader — they’re hopeful that representation on screen will help reshape how audiences view gender in real life.

“I want people to see that there’s more than one way to exist,” they said. “We’re not bound by the old rules anymore. And if I can be part of changing that, then every fight is worth it.”

They’re also planning to launch a foundation focused on mental health resources for LGBTQ+ youth, aiming to provide support for those who feel isolated or rejected.

“There are kids out there who think they’re alone,” Erivo said. “I want them to know they’re not.”

Final Thoughts: A Call for Compassion and Change

Cynthia Erivo’s story is a powerful reminder that fame and fortune cannot shield someone from societal biases.

Their public struggle highlights a pressing issue that extends beyond celebrity culture: the need for basic human respect and dignity, regardless of how someone identifies.

As Erivo continues to break barriers in Hollywood, their journey stands as both an inspiration and a challenge — urging society to grow, to learn, and to lead with empathy.

“I just want to be seen,” Erivo said. “And I know I’m not the only one.”